Salon Reviews What Your Really Really Want
This blog is a direct outgrowth of the book, Yes Means Yes. In turn, the conversations that book sparked led to Jaclyn Friedman’s second book, just out, What You Really Really Want. It was the sort of book that really needed to exist, and because it didn’t, she wrote it. I don’t pretend to any objectivity here, because Jaclyn is my friend and frequent collaborator (and also because I wrote the online supplemental essay to the book, How To Be Good To The Women In Your Life, meant to be read principally by a man in the life of the book purchaser.)
I read much of the book in draft form and I’ll just say that I loved it from the start. But now the reviews are coming in, and people much less attached to Jaclyn and people not so nearly lockstep with her views as I am seem to be agreeing with me: this is a book that needed to exist. Anyone can pretend to have answers, but Jaclyn’s too wise to think that her answers work for everyone. So she provides something much more valuable: tools for women to find their own answers. It’s a workbook, full of writing exercises to cut through layers of cultural programming and make a journey inward.
Salon’s Tracy Clark-Flory briefly reviewed the book and interviewed Jaclyn here. I think the subtitle of the article summarizes it best:
“In an age of Pussycat Dolls and porn, Jaclyn Friedman wants to help young women find an authentic sexual identity”. That’s in, in a nutshell. People who have agendas for women’s sexuality other than self-determination may tell you all kinds of things about what Jaclyn means to do; ignore them. That one sentence from Salon has it exactly right. Jaclyn wants to help young woman find an authentic sexual identity.
Who could be against that? Well, if you’re reading here, the answer to that comes easily. More to the point, why should anyone listen to someone who is against that?