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Looking For BDSM Outside The Clubs

January 10, 2011
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Sometimes, online and such, we end-run the alphabet soup by simply calling it “what it is that we do.”  So if you’ve run across the acronym WIITWD and wondered, now you have your answer.  There are people all over the place doing some variety of WIITWD, some kind of BDSM that not everyone may call BDSM, some kinky things that turn their cranks.  There’s the formal community, online and in real life, in the clubs and bars, orgs and munches, etc.  Those folks stand up to be counted, and the Leather Archives and Museum catalogs that community (communities).

My friend Clarisse Thorn does a lot of work with LA&M, and she is now seeking people who don’t consider themselves part of the formal BDSM community (either because they’ve moved away from it or were never part of it).  I think this is a terrific idea.  The LA&M can he a historical source for a major piece of our culture’s sexuality, but to do that job well it has to have access to what people do outside the organizations and clubs.  This outreach is meant to get to that, and like Maymay, I think this is a good way to do that.

The LA&M is willing to work with people to do interviews by a  number of means and to preserve confidentiality.  They have put out two press releases, one for folks who are aware of the formal community, and one for those who really are not.  I think this is an important historical and cultural project and I hope that if you’re one of the people they are looking for that you will contact the LA&M to arrange an interview.

5 Comments leave one →
  1. January 10, 2011 7:21 pm

    Thanks much.

  2. Lori Adorable permalink
    January 16, 2011 4:14 pm

    Brilliant call, especially considering how unfriendly and exclusive the formal community can be (contrary to stereotypes, I know).

  3. January 22, 2011 10:41 pm

    Not sure how to contact you with this, so I’m leaving the comment here. I came across this press release from University of Texas-Austin [http://www.utexas.edu/news/2011/01/18/premarital_book/?AddInterest=2221] that sort of exemplifies how wrong the commodity model of sex can be. Key bit:

    Regnerus and Uecker describe the “price of sex” as the cost — to men — of romance, status, stability and commitment that men exchange for access to sex in a relationship. They argue that despite women’s successes, contemporary relationships are becoming more male-centered than ever, with men gaining access to sex earlier and more often, yet providing fewer and later commitments than a generation ago.

    “It is, in part, one of the unintended consequences of women’s educational and professional success,” Regnerus says. “Women no longer need men. When that’s the case, how relationships develop will change. And they have.

    “Men’s economic and educational successes have stalled, creating an environment in which fewer educated and financially-stable men are selecting mates from a larger pool of educated and financially-stable women,” he says. “It’s created an imbalance that tips relationship power in the direction of the men. Instead of men competing for women, today women feel like they must compete for men.”

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