The Swedish Model and its discontents

This law is decidedly UNfeminist. One can’t watch this video and think the Swedes are progressive. It is so regressive! Imagine substituting “sex work” for “acting”. Or any other job. How dehumanizing and infantilizing. Is the answer really to shut women up? Honestly. Does anyone still believe that?

“We want to save you! And if you dont appreciate it you will be punished!”

The art and science of pole dance

This is amazing. I never acquired the pole skill displayed here because I always had too many bruises on my thighs from trying. I did master the art of undulation, however, and maybe one day I will post a video of that here. But anyone who can watch this and deny that these women have amazing strength and athletic ability, not to mention pure artistic talent, is in denial. Amazing.

Shut the Subaltern up! And if you can’t do that, deride her.

Partially cross-posted at community.feministing.com

I was appalled to read Donna Hughes’s opinion piece in the Providence Journal entitled “R.I.’s Carnival of Prostitution ,” where she resorts to ad hominem attacks on women who speak for themselves about their experiences in the sex industry. She is an endowed chair at the University of Rhode Island’s Women’s Studies Program, and I am forced to wonder what her students are learning. She condescendingly refers to one woman as “tattooed,” and derides another (while constantly mentioning her ethnicity) for referring to her profession as “it.” As one commenter pointed out,

That never ever ever happens with other professions, right? I mean who, when asked if they enjoyed teaching women’s studies for example, would say “oh yes, I love IT.”

It has been a long-standing issue with sex workers that we are silenced by the media and others; spoken for and about but never with . People even caution others to not listen to us, as we are under “false consciousness” about what we choose to do with our bodies. Now we are being derided by the very people who proclaim to wish to “rescue” us.

Sadly, both the RI house and senate have decided that it is a good thing to criminalize sex workers.

Someday, folks will realize that sex workers are people too, and that we have a voice. And they may just one day begin to listen to us.

Where Are The Women Tops? Where Are The Men Bottoms?

I was prompted to write by Jess Wakeman’s excellent piece on coming to grips with her own bottoming, and the discussion at Feministing.

I can say from personal experience that there are lots of women in the world who top, though not all of them identify as tops or dommes or what-have-you. And there are plenty of men who bottom. Both are nearly unrepresented in the feminist blogosphere — not entirely, but mostly.

I have a hypothesis about why men who bottom are tough to find around the feminist blogosphere: Not a large male population to start with, a general reticence about men admitting that they like to bottom because of masculinity issues, and the amplified if-you’re-a-feminist-dude-you-must-be-a-wuss factor.

Where are the women tops? I don’t know. In part, I think the most vocal women who top butt heads with some feminists and may not particularly want to hang around feminist spaces. But I suspect there are a lot of women topping who just don’t talk about it, even pseudonymously. Not that there’s none, and not that I’m sure my gut is right … but that’s what I think.

And the YMY Oscar goes to…

Tilda Swinton, for the following quote in her tribute to Marisa Tomei’s performance in The Wrestler: “…a stripper need never take off her dignity with her clothes.”

I also award YMY Oscars to Milk screenwriter Dustin Lance Black & Milk star Sean Penn, who were so moving and passionate in their real Oscar speeches, defending lgbt humanity and equality and shaming those who oppose it. Here’s Black:

…if Harvey had not been taken from us 30 years ago, I think he would want me to say to all of the gay and lesbian kids out there tonight who have been told that they are less than by their churches or by the government or by their families, that you are beautiful, wonderful creatures of value, and that no matter what anyone tells you God does love you and that very soon I promise you, you will have equal rights federally across this great nation of ours.

And Penn:

I think that it is a good time for those who voted for the ban against gay marraige to sit and reflect and anticipate their great shame and the shame in their grandchildren’s eyes if they continue that way in their support.

And, finally, a YMY Oscar to Tina Fey, just because.

Who would you give a YMY Oscar to?

So cool.

My friend Dawn Paul sent me this. How I wish I’d written it myself!

Happy V-Day, Everyone

h/t Ann Killough

Why Is This A Joke?

So a porn star is challenging David Vitter for his seat in the Senate.  As you’ll see it this segment, apparently, we’re all supposed to understand that this is a joke. 

I don’t get it.

I’d like the news media to explain why she’s not a “serious” candidate.

I’m all ears. Really. Does she have no policy chops? Does she lack formal education? Is she just dumb? Does she not actually want to run?

I’m all ears. Really. Obviously, there is political theater value to having a sex worker challenge Vitter, who patronized sex workers (notably the service run by Deborah Jeane Palfrey, who is dead under circumstances that make even the most trusting folks turn conspiracy theorist.) So I’m fine with the idea that she’s not a serious candidate, if there’s one good reason to believe she is not qualified. There may be many. But I didn’t hear any of them.

The media thinks they can say she does sex work and we’ll all infer that reason. I won’t. I’d like them to answer the damned question. Is she qualified, and if not, why not?

Quick hit: One of These Things Is Not Like The Other

On Hannity & Colmes , Coulter continues attack on single motherhood, calling it “a recipe to create criminals, strippers, rapists, murderers.”

Wow. I haven’t got time to respond to this properly, but I have to say something here.

Put aside for a moment the egregious attack on single mothers, which is a staple of the Right’s efforts to shame women into letting men/government control our bodies and sexualities.

Because the other thing she’s saying here is strippers = criminals, rapists & murderers. Which… well, just wow.

h/t Stacy Nunnally

.

Social networking sites are the new Dungeons & Dragons

My chosen profession of sexual violence prevention is as prone to buzz and “hot-button issues” as any other, and I’ve been hearing a lot about internet safety over the past 2 years. Usually it goes something like this: “What are we gonna do with these kids?! They’re postin’ half-necked pictures of themsleves, and Johnny Pervert is just waiting to make his move. This ‘Myspace’ is an EVIL influence on our kids!”

Then I proceed to inform everyone in the meeting/conference/whatever, that I’m on Myspace and Facebook, most of my friends are on Myspace and Facebook, and pretending that social networking sites CAUSE sexual assaults against youth is: A) fucking ridiculous (OK, so I don’t say “fucking”), and B) takes the responsibility off of the perpetrators who are the ones CHOOSING to perpetrate. Social networking sites are just their tools du jour. I suppose it used to be candy, hence “Don’t take candy from strangers.” But we didn’t try to villify candy did we?

It’s not that I think there shouldn’t be protections/limits on these sites, and I’m glad that people are out there educating the masses about the potential perils of online social networking. I just get frustrated when people take that next leap to causation, because doing so can have serious repercussions on the allocation of already-sparse sexual violence prevention resources. They see a relatively easy “solution” (e.g., destroy Myspace!) to an incredibly complex problem (sexual violence against youth), and jump on it. In the process they spend a ton of time and energy barking up the wrong tree, completely missing that big-assed forest.

When I hear arguments or news stories about Myspace/Facebook being scourges on our society, it reminds me of when I was 11 and my parents made me stop playing Dungeons & Dragons (aka, D&D, which I loved and still love to this day – go ahead and make your jokes). They watched some Geraldo Rivera “expose” on how D&D corrupts youth and causes kids to jump in front of trains – as if they were a 9th level magic-user with a sweet Telekinesis spell. But it was all bullshit. D&D was/is a game. It might have its faults (which have all been corrected thanks to Version 3.5 thank you very much), but it can’t COMPEL anyone to commit suicide/homicide.

Myspace/Facebook are online-communities/marketing-machines/douchebag-magnets run by corporations. They certainly have their faults, but they sure as hell can’t compel anyone to commit sexual assault. Period.

Oh and Gary Gygax, RIP.